I’ve only heard what I could call an audible voice from the universe/God three times in my life.
Once in 1994, when the “voice” told me to “go.” Once in 2006, when the voice told me “don’t.” and once yesterday, when THAT voice woke me from a nap.
It was simple and not. Following a short walk, I was in my napping chair in the living room, drooling down my fleece when I felt a gentle shake on my shoulder and heard, “OPEN YOUR EYES.”
I will never be able to explain this. I don’t care if anyone gets it or believes it. It was a moving and powerful moment that I can’t find the right words for right now. I did not immediately open my eyes. I was scared. Numb. I tried and my eyes wouldn’t open. I don’t know how long it took me to fully wake up.
I guess I sat for about an hour. Just sat. And sat. When I finally moved, I went outside, and there was my neighbor, The Squirrel Lady. I wondered if OPEN YOUR EYES was for her. I carried on an hour-long conversation with her. We laughed and cried. I found out more about her (and she me) in that hour than I have in the entire nine months my son and I have lived in these apartments.
After that, I ran an errand. A bright bunch of iridescent purple tulips stopped me in my tracks at the entrance to the store. I grabbed them, went inside, and paid for them. Forget that I’d gone there for coffee and half-n-half for the morning. I got in my car and wondered what to do with the flowers.
I was impressed to give them to the mom of one of my 11 year-old son’s playmates. I scribbled a note on a card then chickened out delivering them myself, sending Tate down the lane with the flowers. He said she thanked him. I don’t know if she even likes flowers. Maybe they made her day. Maybe she threw them in the trash?
So this “voice” has said five words to me over the past 19 years. I don’t know what to make of it. I do know that the other two times I did not listen. The results were disastrous in my life. Whoever you are or whatever you are, Hello. This time, you’ve got my attention.